Super 2016

Next year is going to be EPIC!! Why? Because of this…

This is just super!

I don’t profess to know all there is to know about these superheroes but I have watched the movies and that’s about all I need for now, besides, I know about the same amount as you. There are the select few who know EVERYTHING about superheroes down to who made the paper that the comic book was printed on. To those I say, please comment and share your insight about these films.

Batman vs Superman

Can you feel the tension?

First off, Ben Affleck as Batman, I think that’s brilliant. He is a good actor, despite that whole Gigly mishap and he makes a pretty damn decent superhero, remember Daredevil? Secondly, I don’t think the world could quite handle another separate Batman or Superman movie… this had to happen and it will, in March 2016.

Suicide Squad

That cast tho!!

Jared Leto as the joker. And Will Smith as a bad ass Deadshot. Brilliant! Now, let this be known, Heath Ledger left some pretty big ass shoes for Leto to fill. But I have seen some infographics that depict that Leto’s joker is a different kind of joker than Ledger’s one was. Either way, Leto will be epic and I can’t wait till August 2016 to see it.

Captain America: Civil War

Indeed, whose side ARE you on?

Again, 2 heroes fighting each other. This time it is 2 that, just last year, saved the world side by side in Avengers. Iron Man and duh, Captian Freedom himself. Why am I excited about this? Well because it’s Robert Downy Jr and Chris Evans. Now we get to see them battle it out in May 2016. Yeah!

X-Men: Apocalypse

Well looky looky

I grew up with X-men, as a staple. Wolverine, Rogue, Gene, Cyclops, Dr X, all of them. Every time a new X came out I had to movie marathon before watching the next one. The marathon is now very long but as long as Hugh Jackman stays Wolverine, (which he is rumoured to do) I do not mind popping the corn and watching it all over again. And who can say no to a bit of Jennifer Lawrence? I will be taking a week off work to marathon X-men before it comes out also in May 2016.

The Sinister 6

Maybe they will still make it, for another year.

Has been cancelled… but I think it would have been great. All the best Spiderman super villains in one movie, fighting against Spiderman. Why not?

Dr Strange

Strange indeed!

To be honest, I have never even heard of this superhero, BUT I have heard of Benedict Cumberbatch and Rachel McAdams and with them in this film what can go wrong? McAdams has proven herself to be a great comicbook type-ish actress in Sherlock Holmes so why not again, with another Holmes (Cumberbatch) in November 2016?

Gambit

This is not an official movie poster, this is fan art, also not done by me.

Now we get to the GREAT bits. And by bits I mean Channing Tatum. He is just my absolute favourite and it’s about time he gets to superhero it, along with the greats. The man can dance, he is hilarious, he can do soft and mushy (not my favourite but that’s probably just me), he does action like a beast. In my opinion he is beautifully talented and October 2016 I will be ready for that talent to melt my face. oh and just for funsies…

BAM!!!

Lastly *DRUMROLL*

DEADPOOL!!!

Express some RAGE!!

Of all the upcoming movies, this one is the one I am MOST looking forward to. To be released in Feb 2016. Ryan Reynolds comes back for a full feature film as Deadpool and it looks brilliant. Deadpool and Gambit should feature together… Ryan and Channing. How awesome would that be? Like Tatum, Reynolds is super funny, can do action like a vampire beast and theres the mushy stuff and also this…

Just, I mean, wow!

I didn’t include a trailer for the other’s because 1) I don’t know if all of them have trailers yet, and 2) Deadpool’s trailer beats all.

Special Mention!!!

Finding Dory

YEAH!!!!

What kind of cold hearted person would I be is Dory didn’t have a place on the superheroes list. She is definitely a superhero to me and I can’t wait to see Dory voices by the amazing Ellen DeGeneres in 2015, that’s right, we get to see it THIS YEAR! After a long ass wait, it’s about time Dory. But hey, maybe she forgot what she was doing a few times and had to start over the whole time.

So many awesome movies coming out in 2016.

Winter: Jou koudhartige tert!

Daar was lanklaas n ou Afrikaanse nommertjie, dit is nou tyd. Ek vermy maar meestal die Afrikaans skrywery, want waar ander mense met gevleuelde woorde n prentjie kan verf dat die soos n helder sommersdag klink, is my Afrikaans nie so hoog of gevleueld nie. My Afrikaanse kennis en taalgebruik is boonop nou besmet met die Ingels dat ek baie van die vlot hoogs Afrikaans net sal beledig. Maar, hier gat ons… maak jou reg vir n poespas. (Kommaan, jy kan nie vir my sê dat jy nie ietwat van n gag-reflex het elke keer wat n ou tannie vir jou sê “jou hare lyk soos n poespas” nie, daai word gly so maklik van die tong af soos wat n ys-skaats op teer gly.) Anyway…

Winter… As n Suid-Afrikaner voel ek dat ons hier onder nie altyd reg voorberei vir nie totaal-en-alle slagting van drome, vreugde en hoop wat gebeur gedurende die donker maande van winter. Ja ja, ek weet, Johannesburg se winter is niks teen die Kaap se reën en Kokstad se sneeu nie. Maar in ieder geval is die winter in Johannesburg steeds n koud-hartige tert.

Op daardie jolige noot deel ek my redes hoekom ek winter haat met jou, daars n paar so ek hoop jyt n bersie, en n ietsie warms te drinke, cos you might be here a while.

1. Die obvious een… Koue! Dit is blerrie koud. Is daar meer te sê rondom die punt? Behalwe om natuurlik die wetenskap agter die verskynsel van winter te verduidelik, maar as jy oud genoeg is om dié blog te lees, dan weet jy seker hoe die seisoene werk. Indien nie, kan ek vir jou my laerskool wetenskap juffrou se nommer gee.
2. Wat het n winter in Johannesburg, die Sahara woestyn en my sin vir humor in gemeen? DIS DROOG. Als is droog, lug, gras, bome, vel, lippe… als behalwe die wasgoed (wat jy eergister uitgehang het) is droog. Gesaamentlik met die droogte is daar nog n spesiale wetenskaplike verskynsel – statiese elektrisiteit. Nou dit, en lang sagte (finominale, asemrowende) en reguit hare, gaan nie goed saam nie. Ooit n wollerige ietsie oor jou kop getrek in die middle van winter? Ja, ek wag nog vir die oomblik wat ek kan lostrek met die Oog van die Tier – as die Afrikaanse Tina Draaier.
   

   Ons kan almal net eenvoudig nie die beste wees nie… (come on that was good)

   Elke winter dink ek dit is my tyd… elke winter is ek teleurgesteld.

3. Volgende vraag: Wat het Shrek, uie, koek en Johannesburgers in die winter in gemeen? Lae! LAYERS!
   
   Dink Michelin Oros mannetjie. As dit jou nie laat ongemaklik voel net om te dink aan die aantal lae nie, dan kan ons nie vriende wees nie. Dis ski-pants en jeans en boots met 2 pare wollerige sokkies. ‘n Wessie (wie dra nog daais?) en 3 ander langmou hemde wat na n ruk jou bloed sirkulasie afsny want hulle is nie gemaak of gekoop om so te layer nie en n trui EN dan 2 baadjies, n serp en handskoene. En dit is sodat jy BINNE n vertrek kan sit en vries. Suid_Afrika is nou ongelukkig nie so ver gevorder as om n gebou uit te rus vir die hel wat winter is nie. Het jy al probeer jou bra strap wat so stadig maar seker by jou skouer af donner probeer optrek onder al daardie lae? Mens het n versameling argeologiese toerusting nodig om dit reg te kry. Toilet toe gaan is n uur lange ekspedisie, by die tyd dat jy als afgetrek het is jy so uit asem dat jy bly sit, lank nadat jou blaas leeg getap is van al die koffie wat jy drink om jou siel op te warm.
4. Slaap tyd… sedert ons as volwassenes probeer die lewe en al sy dinge aanvat, is slaap tyd vir ons soos om die Lotto te wen. Maar in winter is dit soos die oefening wat jy so drasties nodig het, maar nie doen nie want dis te effen koud om te funksioneer as enigiets. Want soos jou klere, is jou bed net so vol lae. Daars n laken, dan n kombers, dan nog n kombers, jou vere duvet (as jy jouself onder die gelukkiges kan tel) en dan nog n kombers. Nadat jy daai hele storie ge”deadlift” het net om in te klim, moet jy nou gemaklik raak, en soos jy skarrel en rol, koek die komberse om jou en kleef aan jou vas tot jy nie meer kan beweeg nie.
5. Dis donker… Ek is n sonskyn kind. Ek het so veel as moontlik sonskyn so lank as moontlik nodig. Nou vat jy minstens 3 ure se lekker son weg en vervang dit met koue. Dis nie vir my n wen-wen ooreenkoms nie.
6. Sonder al die Michelin mannetjie lae, lyk mens in elkgeval soos n Michelin man want, wat is daar om te doen as jy koud kry? Eet!!! En wie de moer gaan n slaai sit en eet in die koue? En wie wil in die koue staan en kook? Nee KFC en pizza, onder n kombers of 10 met Friends wat vir die hoeveelste keer speel, is presies wat ons in die winter doen. Ek sê jou, die liewe Here moes die mens ook n hibernerende dier gemaak het.
7. Daai paar sekondes wat dit vat vir jou brein om agter te kom dat die bad/stort water nie te warm is nie, jou lyf is net te koud. Daai steek pyn! Loads of pain! Oh en dan die vries nadat jy uit die bad of stort uit klim. Jy kan nie vining genoeg afdroog en aantrek nie want dis soos liquid nitrogen, jy vries amper onmiddelik…
8. Het ek KOUD genoem? Ek is seker ek het. Hier is dit weer… dis koud. Jou hande is koud, voete is koud, ore, neus, tot jou oë is koud. Nou sê my gou, hoe de donner moet mens vriendelik wees onder sulke omstandighede?
9. Mense wat hou van die koue! Daars niks meer om te sê as, ek bid vir julle!! Daai mense wat in die somer sê “ek kan nie wag vir winter nie”. Dis julle skuld! Dis als julle skuld dat ons so moet suffer in die winter sodat jy kan cuddle en gemaklik-ongemaklik sit en hot chocolate in jou wol jas drink. Vir jou sal ek tackle, wanneer my bene ontdooi en ek seker is dat hulle nie semier sal breek op impak nie.

As jy in een van die noordelike lande waar die son en aarde n lang afstand verhouding het bly, dan is ek jammer.  Ek voel so bietjie van jou pyn… Maar jy kies om daar te bly, EN julle het dié,

Northern Lights… Dis amazing!

so my simpatie is so diep soos n modderige poeletjie op n sonskyn dag.

Just wait and see…

Whether you are a male or female, reading this you know that in your life there are certain goals that you have set for yourself and there are a whole different set of goals that those you call friends/family have set for you, oh and then there is the set of goals that society has set based on whether you have boobs or a penis.

This is my rant about that, what friends/ family and society wants from me, not necessarily for me. The moment you pop out of the womb all nekkid and bloody (it’s a reality, deal with it. At least I’m not posting pictures of actual births, you pansy) and the doctor proclaims to your swearing mother and sweating father it’s a boy or girl based upon the presence or absence of some key instruments, people start forming a life for you. Right from the colour of the babygro you wear from that moment to the type of sport played and the type of work you can/can’t do.

*Quick disclaimer (cos at this point you probably think you know where this is going): I am not a feminist. Whatever that means.

So you go through school making friends with more of the same marginalised individuals. Oh, you are a girl? Here cooking/sewing classes. What’s that? A penis? Here, woodwork classes. What, you want to play rugby? But you are a girl, are you lesbian? (I have legitimately been asked this) Yeah that’s what we face and we wonder where everyone’s creativity has gone to?

You grow up, wanting to break the mould of what, mostly, society wants from you, but that doesn’t get perceived as you trying to be your own person. No no, you get labelled rebellious, hyperactive, even depressed. And instead of trying to find the stimulants that your actual genius of a child needs you chuck a bunch of psychologists and pills at them and go about your day. Because, society states that if you don’t fit the mould, you are not welcome, something must be done to fix this glitch in the system. How dare you try and be different. How dare you have your own thoughts, dreams, wants, needs? We proclaim freedom of speech but force you to say what we want to hear.

On that note, have you watched Divergent?

Now you have reached adult level. You have survived thus far with the constant struggle against the walls of the box that you are forced into. You break out of one only to find that it’s a Russian doll effect. You have these dreams that you have formed in the privacy of your mind that you never give voice to because you have learnt that it is not lady-like, or that boys don’t do that kind of thing. So you sit, in the quiet, in the dark spaces of your mind day-dreaming of freedom to live your life the way that makes you feel alive. Can you see what’s happening? Resentment for those that blindly push you into the box because of tradition.

Let’s take me for instance. (You knew it would end up here anyway). I am a girl, female, woman, “fairer sex”. I do not want children, I have NEVER wanted children, I do not aim to ever have children. (I see you gasping there, you with the dream of what every girl should want and have). Yes, that’s right. Oh, and I also never want to get married. I don’t have and never had a dream of what my perfect dress/wedding day/ honeymoon blah blah blah would look like. You wanna know what I dream(t) of? Playing rugby/cricket with my brothers, climbing trees, becoming a pro-surfer, becoming a CSI agent. Becoming a fighter pilot for some air-force. ANY air-force. I even seriously considered becoming a pro wrestler at one stage. I do not dream of playing house one day. But DARE I say that, dare I mention that I do not want or really like children, it’s like I have blasphemed in 10 different languages. That’s when you can see that person try and come up with a reason in their mind. A reason as to why this woman (wait is she really a woman?) would want to NOT be the woman as is expected…

Obviously something must have happened to this poor, broken, damaged woman. How can she not want the ONE thing she is created for? Maybe she was hurt as a child, maybe it’s because her parents are divorced, that’s why she doesn’t want to get married and have children. Something awful must have happened to steal this dream from this poor unfortunate soul… Their responses range from:

“Oh, just wait, one day a man will come and sweep you off of your feet and you will forget that you didn’t want to get married.”

“Yes, you say you will never have kids, just wait. You just wait and see.”

“WE’LL SEE!”

Or, you try and convince me that the way I am thinking is wrong. That, I am wrong for wanting something so out of the ordinary.

You know what that says to me? It says: “You obviously don’t know what you want in your life. You are not a whole person. You can’t be trusted to make life decisions because you are a shell of a woman, and even though we love you and want only the best for you, we don’t believe that YOU know what the best for you is. So we will spend every waking moment trying to figure out what has happened to you and try and fix you.” it also says to me that: “God must have made a mistake with you…” *I’ll just let that sink in*

Lucky for me, I know what my identity in God is, that identity is not connected to a child or marriage. If and when I decide to have children or get married or stop punching my brother’s then it will be because I have made that decision. And that child or husband will be loved beyond measure and without doubt because I will know that my heart was pure. And when I have made that decision and you come up to me saying “I told you so”, I will punch you.

I didn’t write this to spark some kind of rebellion in someone. I am just trying to say that you should find out who God has made you to be and try and live so that you are true to that person.