Swamp thing

I had this grand idea of writing and publishing 30 posts in 30 days… Yeah!!! It hasn’t exactly been going all that well.

I have been SWAMPED and, if I’m being totally honest, I’ve been lazy. In my mind, all I can imagine doing after work is vegging in front of my laptop watching Scrubs (you remember that show? You should. It’s freaking brilliant!)

Scrubs is a brilliant show, enough of the feels to make you nearly cry but then it turns it right back around with a Coxism or a JD daydream. It’s feel good and it needs to be watched by all people all the time, alongside Friends. I mean, who needs these new series or the 11th season of Grey’s Anatomy? Who needs to know what happens when winter finally gets here? I’ll just stick to the good ol… er… oldies. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

Come now, Judith!!

Where was I? Oh yes, swamped. I tried being a blogging factory popping one out every day and for a bit there I did well… Till work and studies could no longer be ignored and I had to get deadlines and exams out of the way. See these things were interfering with my schedule of doing pretty much nothing. Ok, no, that’s a lie, I didn’t do nothing. Although, now I AM doing nothing which is the whole reason I am not getting to my 30 posts thing.

I’m not one for these personal insight kinda posts but I felt it needed some explanation, and I felt guilty. I feel guilty most days, everything I do is overshadowed by some form of guilt. Watching series, ‘You should be studying” buying ANYTHING “You should be saving‘ eating my fourth bag of chips that week, “I’m just here working on your will, since you’ll be dead soon because of that unhealthy shit’. The guilt is real and it’s everywhere.

So, on that note, I will try and write a post a day for the next few days. Don’t hold me to it tho, cos I’m still quite swamped.

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The one where Rachel sucks

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F.R.I.E.N.D.S is that one show, that brilliant sitcom, that funny timeless sitcom that has just enough feels to keep you coming back for more. (Don’t mind if I do) I have watched Friends countless times (I say countless ‘cos if I DID count the times I have watched it, it would probably be an embarrassing number of times) and each time I am reminded why it is so close to my heart. I have written another post about Friends HERE.

All that mushy stuff being said, there is a BUT, with me there is always a BUT(T), the last few episodes I watched made me realise that Rachel is a self centered BEEP BEEP BEEP!!! Especially towards the end of season 4 and through season 5.

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You know it!

SPOILER ALERT (You know, for if you are one of those unfortunates who have not had the privilege, nay, the honour, of watching Friends, and you still want to watch it, then take a few months and watch it before reading further)

Here’s why I say Rachel is a BEEP BEEP… yeah ok. Bitch: End of S04 Phoebe is muchos pregnant and can’t go with the others to London for Ross’ wedding. After getting an invite from Ross (which, you know, is a bad idea) Rachel decides to stay in NYC to “look after Phoebe” as going to Ross’ wedding would just be too painful. I can’t stress enough at HOW PREGNANT Phoebe actually is… she’s carrying triplets people, TRIPLETS!!! In fact she is so close to popping that in S05 a few days after the others are back from London she goes into freakin labour… THAT PREGNANT!

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THIS PREGNANT!!! Balancing cereal on your belly level pregnant. 

Anyway, back to end of S04, Phoebe marvels at how well Rachel is handling Ross getting married, what with being in love with him and all. Then Rachel has this mini freakout at Phoebe, for not telling her that she (Rachel?!) is in love with Dr Dino. Really? So longish story short, Rachel packs a bag and fucks right off to London, leaving Phoebe’s very VERY pregnant ass at home, to go tell Ross (who is getting married) that she loves him, because “then he can make a decision having all the information”. Shitty friend move 1.

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What an idiot!

So, she doesn’t actually TELL Ross she loves him, so points to her there, BUT(T) after he says HER name at the altar instead of his fiance’s (which is exponentially worse that shouting out the wrong name in the throws of passion) and both Ross and Rachel end up at the airport, one waiting to go home and the other waiting for wifey to go on honeymoon, Ross (like a dipshit) asks Rachel to go on his honeymoon with him, you know as a friend, and she says no… Yeah right… that would mean shes not a bitch. She says yes!! Honestly, woman!!! Shitty person move 2.

Rachel goes to Greece alone, (cos wifey shows up just as they are about to go through and Ross runs after her) comes back and pretends that going alone was great. When wifey gives Dino-man an ultimatum: she’ll move to USA if Ross never sees Rachel again and Ross agrees, tells Rachel, she flips out. As if she didn’t plan to tell him she loved him on.his.wedding.day and as if Ross didn’t say her name at the altar on.his.wedding.day! Fast forward to the inevitable demise of Ross and wifey’s marriage, Rachel wastes zero time trying to get in there. Shitty friend/person move 3.

Ok, lets have a look a bit earlier in S04 where Ross announces his engagement, Rachel lies about the intensity of her and JoshUAH’s relationship, proposes to Joshua (who’s own divorce isn’t even final yet) and ultimately drives him away all because she has to save face. Shitty person move 4.

Actually, as a collection of friends who, at this point have been close friends for at least 5 years, they SUCK at being good friends. For instance Rachel comes back and Phoebe doesn’t even give her a stern talking to, you know, friend to friend, for just leaving her alone all pregnant and what not! Monica is the only one who attempts to talk sense into Rachel when she’s freaking out about Ross saying her name,  but lets be real it was with minimum effort. I would have clothes lined the shit out of Rachel as soon as I saw her trying to ruin another friend’s wedding. Joey had one job, look out for Rachel and stop her… but he gets distracted by boobs, Chandler is too busy chasing Monica ass to think anywhere north of his belt. It’s like none of these Friends really have each other’s backs. So a collective shitty friends move 5.

Anything Rachel related that you can think of?

 

DEADPOOL: My Biased Review

25 February 2016 will forever be a day that is celebrated and revered as THE day that I watched Deadpool for the first, and definitely not the last, time. I remember when it first got announced that they were MAKING Deadpool and that Ryan Reynolds (oh mama) would be playing the Merc with a Mouth. In my opinion, NO ONE ELSE would be able to play DP better and Ryan already had that schpeel as DP in X-Men Origins, which we do not speak of here, but he redeemed himself… in the most gloriously graphic and beautifully violent way.

To understand my obsession with DP, I will take you on a journey to the year 2002… the first time I laid eyes on the marvel (see what I did there) that is Ryan Reynolds.

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Write that down!

It’s hilarious and it shows a PRE-gravitational force Tara Reid… Ahem. Then just 2 years later in 2004 he looked like this…

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“I ate a lot of garlic and I just farted. Silent but deadly”

I mean, come on, surely that is super impressive on ANY level!? He is hilarious in ALL the movies that I have seen him in and if you have not watched Blady Trinity, do yohself a favour and watch it. It’s really good. Obviously Reynolds has a superhero physique and he definitely has the  humor to pull of the Merc with a Mouth.

My first encounter with DP was in X-Men Origins, it was a rather disappointing encounter and I never really paid much more attention to DP after that, who wants a Merc with NO mouth, where is the humour??? This is the part where I apologise to all the die hard DP fans who knew everything about him BEFORE Hollywood decided he needs his own movie. I would be honoured to be counted among your elite numbers and learn your ways, also, I would love to hear your thoughts on the movie.

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Oh, it’s spectacular!

My thoughts on the movie are simple… IT. IS. AMAZING!! It did not in any way disappoint, you know how sometimes if a trailer is brilliant then there’s nothing left for the movie? Yeah, that is so not the case here. Right from the start it is hilarious and by that I mean the opening credits. (Are you taking notes?) The action, the bloody marvelous action and for the males reading this, the women. The quick witted, next level type comedy, that only Reynolds would be able to pull off. Everything around this movie is brilliant, right from the trailers, teasers and campaign for the movie, to the actual movie itself.

I do not want to spoil anything for anyone who has not watched it. Please go watch it, your life will be enriched. PRO TIP: Watch the trailers right before watching the movie… it’s like stretching before you exercise, gets the blood flowing and gets you all excited. Oh and FFS, stay till after the credits. Don’t be the THAT guy. ALL MARVEL MOVIES HAVE POST CREDIT SCENES!!! Sheesh noobie!

You look like an avocado that had sex with an older avocado!

Best of all… it has been announced that a Deadpool 2 for 2017 is in the works. YAAAASSSSS!!! And it’s rumoured there might be a PROPER Deadpool / X-Men crossover.

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Thank you 9GAG!

 

Super 2016

Next year is going to be EPIC!! Why? Because of this…

This is just super!

This is just super!

I don’t profess to know all there is to know about these superheroes but I have watched the movies and that’s about all I need for now, besides, I know about the same amount as you. There are the select few who know EVERYTHING about superheroes down to who made the paper that the comic book was printed on. To those I say, please comment and share your insight about these films.

Batman vs Superman

Can you feel the tension?

Can you feel the tension?

First off, Ben Affleck as Batman, I think that’s brilliant. He is a good actor, despite that whole Gigly mishap and he makes a pretty damn decent superhero, remember Daredevil? Secondly, I don’t think the world could quite handle another separate Batman or Superman movie… this had to happen and it will, in March 2016.

Suicide Squad

That cast tho!!

That cast tho!!

Jared Leto as the joker. And Will Smith as a bad ass Deadshot. Brilliant! Now, let this be known, Heath Ledger left some pretty big ass shoes for Leto to fill. But I have seen some infographics that depict that Leto’s joker is a different kind of joker than Ledger’s one was. Either way, Leto will be epic and I can’t wait till August 2016 to see it.

Captain America: Civil War

Indeed, whose side ARE you on?

Indeed, whose side ARE you on?

Again, 2 heroes fighting each other. This time it is 2 that, just last year, saved the world side by side in Avengers. Iron Man and duh, Captian Freedom himself. Why am I excited about this? Well because it’s Robert Downy Jr and Chris Evans. Now we get to see them battle it out in May 2016. Yeah!

X-Men: Apocalypse

Well looky looky

Well looky looky

I grew up with X-men, as a staple. Wolverine, Rogue, Gene, Cyclops, Dr X, all of them. Every time a new X came out I had to movie marathon before watching the next one. The marathon is now very long but as long as Hugh Jackman stays Wolverine, (which he is rumoured to do) I do not mind popping the corn and watching it all over again. And who can say no to a bit of Jennifer Lawrence? I will be taking a week off work to marathon X-men before it comes out also in May 2016.

The Sinister 6

Maybe they will still make it, for another year.

Maybe they will still make it, for another year.

Has been cancelled… but I think it would have been great. All the best Spiderman super villains in one movie, fighting against Spiderman. Why not?

Dr Strange

Strange indeed!

Strange indeed!

To be honest, I have never even heard of this superhero, BUT I have heard of Benedict Cumberbatch and Rachel McAdams and with them in this film what can go wrong? McAdams has proven herself to be a great comicbook type-ish actress in Sherlock Holmes so why not again, with another Holmes (Cumberbatch) in November 2016?

Gambit

This is not an official movie poster, this is fan art, also not done by me.

This is not an official movie poster, this is fan art, also not done by me.

Now we get to the GREAT bits. And by bits I mean Channing Tatum. He is just my absolute favourite and it’s about time he gets to superhero it, along with the greats. The man can dance, he is hilarious, he can do soft and mushy (not my favourite but that’s probably just me), he does action like a beast. In my opinion he is beautifully talented and October 2016 I will be ready for that talent to melt my face. oh and just for funsies…

BAM!!!

BAM!!!

Lastly *DRUMROLL*

DEADPOOL!!!

Express some RAGE!!

Express some RAGE!!

Of all the upcoming movies, this one is the one I am MOST looking forward to. To be released in Feb 2016. Ryan Reynolds comes back for a full feature film as Deadpool and it looks brilliant. Deadpool and Gambit should feature together… Ryan and Channing. How awesome would that be? Like Tatum, Reynolds is super funny, can do action like a vampire beast and theres the mushy stuff and also this…

Just, I mean, wow!

Just, I mean, wow!

I didn’t include a trailer for the other’s because 1) I don’t know if all of them have trailers yet, and 2) Deadpool’s trailer beats all.

Special Mention!!!

Finding Dory

YEAH!!!!

YEAH!!!!

What kind of cold hearted person would I be is Dory didn’t have a place on the superheroes list. She is definitely a superhero to me and I can’t wait to see Dory voices by the amazing Ellen DeGeneres in 2015, that’s right, we get to see it THIS YEAR! After a long ass wait, it’s about time Dory. But hey, maybe she forgot what she was doing a few times and had to start over the whole time.

So many awesome movies coming out in 2016.

This is Serie-ous!!!

Game of Thrones, Suits, How I Met Your Mother, The Big Bang Theory, Grey’s Anatomy, House, Brooklyn Nine Nine, Walking Dead, Breaking Bad, Dexter, Once Upon A Time, No Life… oh no wait, that last one is not a series, but you get my point. With so many options on the series buffet table for the brain it’s no wonder we struggle with real life stuff!!

So much to watch, so little time!!

So much to watch, so little time!!

We engross ourselves so deep into our fantasy lives that when our real lives fall apart we don’t understand why. By real lives I mean the life where you have to work for your food and where your boyfriend doesn’t take you back when you cheated on him. The life where if you are running away from some drug dealers and find yourself in the middle of some big attorney firm’s interviews the last thing that will happen is you get a job. Or MAYBE these things just happen in America, I can’t think why they have employment issues…

Classics!! This is what it was all about!

Classics!! This is what it was all about!

Anyway, I haven’t watched series of any kind for almost a year. What I mean by watched is, I haven’t lost days worth of time by binge watching one series till the birds let me know its time to wake up from not sleeping and get ready for work, where all you can think about is whether Dexter will find the person who did that nasty thing to that other person! No, I didn’t go on a brain cleanse or something weird like that. I just didn’t have a pc to watch it off of. Well, that and my previous housemates did not have a TV. I gotta say It’s been great. You have a crap load of time if you don’t spend all your time watching other people live their lives. That being said, I do love series but the classics, like Friends, Scrubs, Seinfeld,  you know the good stuff. Oh but wait, Harvey Specter!!!!!  Oh mama!

I like you too...THIS. I mean THIS

I like you too…THIS. I mean THIS

So, maybe I just need a serie-ous intervention. I recently got a laptop (a blessing from an amazing lady) and I am trying not to get sucked into the series vortex! Apart from working 2 jobs and doing classes and church, basically not having time for much other than catch up on sleep, it has been great not being consumed by the need to know what is happening next in a show. Or the agony of having to wait a whole year for the next season… YES, I am looking at you all my Game of Throne’rs, only a few more months till the killing continues, I don’t know why you all just don’t read the books. Spoiler-alert, averted! I am aiming to read the books this holiday,  but I am so far behind in the reading I should have done for class soooo yeah, my priorities are out of whack! For now, I am watching Friends because it makes me feel good.

Hmm... I don't fully agree with that but its a good quote non the less.

Hmm… I don’t fully agree with that but its a good quote non the less.

What series are you stuck on or can’t wait for?