That’s Coconuts!!

Let’s just clear the air real quick… I’ve been busy. *Awkward silence*

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Soooooo…. How’ve yah been?

Good, now that that’s taken care of, I’m back bitches, and I have tips… more accurately dry tips, on the ends of my hair. *Cue dry humour laugh* 

Seriously though, my ends are dry AF, because growing hair is te.di.ous and because I kinda suck at maintenance… Perfect girlfriend material here!! My hair grows slower than a herd  of tortoises (collective noun for tortoises?!) plowing through peanut butter, but it grows. But also in order to grow longer hair you have to cut the ends every 2 months, I am VERY bad at respecting the rules sooooo instead, I mix it up and just go to a professional every 6 to 8 months. *OMG! Yes, I know*. The rest of the time I cut it myself, I do not recommend it for straight haired people.

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No one cuts their own hair this straight.

Cut (ha ha) to now. My hair had a professional doing the snipping and it looks healthier, which is GRAND. But I am now very aware that the tips need some special TLC… Tender loving COCONUTS. HA!!! Psych! Coconut oil masks are the future!! *The title makes more sense now, doesn’t it?*

The interwebs are going NUTS (ha ha) for coconut everythings. It seems that any beauty blogger, vlogger and jogger worth her/his *I don’t discriminate… out loud* sea-salt scrub,  has some kind of hack involving coconut oil. I am not a beauty blogger, vlogger or jogger, but for those who care, I’ma lay some truth on you. In the form of a coconut oil face and hair mask. I’ll also mention a few other tips, involving coconut oil, that I heard of that I but may, or may not, have tried .

I’ll start with the face scrub/mask. Mix coconut oil, new or used ground coffee *PRO TIP: this is coffee beans that have been ground… NOT coffee that was on the ground* and some honey, slap that onto your face and massage in for a while. Leave on for 15mins or until you wake up from your nap and just rinse off with some warm water… no soap. What’s GRAND is you don’t need moisturiser afterwards. Side note, I tried to mix in lemon juice but the juice and the oil had a fight and well, they didn’t wanna speak sooo yeah, I just used it anyway. You don’t have to.

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Yes, this is me with a nut mask on… 

Next, coconut oil hair mask, super easy, SUPER effective. Heat up some oil in the microwave, dip your DRY hair (water and oil are not friends) into the oil and finger comb the oil up to the roots. Don’t put so much oil in that your hair is dripping and also do not pour the oil over your head like you are Aaron. *Sneaky Bible reference* Your roots have this amazing oil making factory so they don’t need the nut oil. *That sounds dirty*. So yes, from the ends up to the roots, massage the roots slightly if you want, wrap your hair into some loose bun thing so that you can cover it up. The way you wanna cover it up looks a little like this…

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Kinda joking… but also, try it. Now I don’t have the wrapping skills, nor did I have a shower cap (which you can obviously also use), so I just covered my hair with some cling wrap and then wrapped it with a scarf, because I am a fixer. Sleep with all that in your hair and then wash it out in the morning. I did a 2:1 shampoo:conditioner ratio and then let my hair air dry. BEST. EVER!

Lemme brag a bit, I have virgin hair… meaning my hair is waiting for marriage… oh wait no. Ha. It just means I have never dyed my hair *Side note: don’t you think it’s ironic that dyed sounds like died… and you kinda kill your hair when you dye/die it?! BOOM. Mic drop* so my hair is super soft to start off with, but after nutting it *another dirty one* it was the superest *that’s a word now* of soft. It also seemed to stay clean for longer even after I tried the ol’ lemon juice & sunlight natural highlight trick, twice. So I nutted *Ok that’s enough now* it on Sunday night, Monday washed it, Tuesday and Wednesday juiced it, and for the rest of the week did all sorts of styles with it to see how it holds up. I’m talking hair spray, baby powder and just a lot of teasing. Washed it a week later and it is just GRAND. I would probably not go that long without at least rinsing it a few times, but still… WINNING!

Now some other things coconut oil can be used for:

  • Make-up remover *I have not tried it*
  • Face moisturiser (I like it)
  • Cooking… duh.
  • Cuticle oil
  • Wooden furniture polish
  • Lastly… this one I have not tried but this vlogger mentioned it: Coconut oil helps ease the itch of yeast infection. *WHAT!?* You dip a tampon into the oil and then stick it way up there, again I have not tried it, but I thought I’d mention it, cos I care. I know… it’s NUTS!

So there you have it, nutty coconut oil tips… for your tips and more.

What tips do you have for coconut oil uses… or, you know, just general life tips?

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