So you think you can adult?!

What age should really be classified as the official becoming of age, er, age? 18? 21? 25? It can for damn sure not be 18. I am unclear as to my own reasons for why that is, but for now, that is my verdict. In some cases it can be 21, no wait, I don’t think that is possible. Maybe it is 25. Maybe it is not an age thing at all but rather a mindset thing. Maybe its both age and mindset.

That’s when it hits you!!

Whichever it is, there should be basic tests to mark one as fit for adulting around and being proud of it. Yes, I just turned adult into a verb, because being an adult means DOING SHIT FOR YOURSELF!!! It means waking yourself up, dressing yourself in anything other than a superhero cape and underwear and getting yourself to that job you hate but appreciate because adults work and earn a living as responsible cogs in the machine that is society. Adults pay rent at a house that is not their mother’s or anywhere on their parent’s property… listen, Prince Harry, if you are reading this then I’m sure you have a whole other set of rules and stuff that qualifies you as an adult and you for damn sure don’t need to pay rent at Buckinham Palace, although living with your grandma is kinda weird. Just saying!

So how do you know you are operating on Adult Turf? If you start budgeting with your income, that might be a sign. Wait wait, if you have income that is enough to budget with, that is. Another sign might be that all your school time friends are either engaged, or married, or have kids or all of the above. Hey, you might find yourself being engaged or married or with child… that’s a clear sign that you adulting like a BOSS!

Just like Spongebob with his adult tie!!

If you have ever uttered the phrase “When I was younger…” while referring to a period of time more than 5 years ago, you, my friend, are swimming in the adult pond. Welcome, we don’t know what we are doing here or how we got here, the ones over by the lily pads seem to have things figured out, they have those sustainable income things with investments , insurance and such. Try and stay afloat while the rest of us figures out what a bond is!

If you have ever during the search for a new job, because you have been at your current job for over 5 years (another indication of the state of adultship) and you feel it’s time for some growth, as is expected of adults, find yourself asking a potential employer whether the job has perks like medical and pension, you are most definitely an adult. Children or teens or, as I call anyone under 21, SCUM… do not spare any though towards aging. To them the concept is foreign and other worldly. They also don’t think of medical aid, because, “Broh, I can totally jump over all 5 of you guys with these iceskates on. No I’m not drunk, I’ve only had like 10 tequilas, you know my limit is like 15, shut up and lay down!” Dylan Moran says that you don’t really become and adult, adults are just tall children holding a beer!

If you can read comments or a blog (like this one) and not get angry or feel insulted by content that differ from your point of view or seem slightly insulting in it’s humour, you might be an adult. If you can refrain from sending that oh-so-innocent passive-aggressive status about your views that clearly differ from someone else’s views and you just sold your balls on Ebay which prevents you from speaking to that person directly, then you win at being an adult.

I however, even though I pay my own rent, get myself to work, dress myself and budget with my salary, am not an adult… I refuse to adult. It is a trap!!